What I’ve learned from being in a long distance relationship.
With Valentines Day just passed it got me thinking about my relationship and what we’d end up doing this year to celebrate. But then I realised the 14th is on a Wednesday, and I live in Glasgow and David lives in Newcastle. So trying to make any plans on the specific day were a write off.
We’ve been doing long distance for almost 5 months now (I completely didn’t realise it had been that long) but this isn’t the first time we’ve done it. Sadly the second time hasn’t been much easier, but if you’re also struggling to get by in a LDR I thought I’d share my tips and tricks.
It’s going to be hard.
Firstly you’re gonna have to realise that it’s not that easy (for most people) – and that you might not always be able to see each other. Depending on how far your other half lives, you might have to go weeks or months without seeing each other. That can put a strain on a relationship – after all it’s spending time together that makes a relationship stronger.
Communication is key.
With all that distance between you both, you’re going to have to get used to communicating as much as you can. Before me & David went long distance, he used to hate talking on the phone (tbh he still does), but he realised that it was the best way to catch up and (soppyily) hear the other persons voice. Speaking on the phone, or using skype/face time can actually make you feel closer to your partner, and when you’re missing them like crazy this is the next best thing to actually seeing them irl. So if you ain’t prepared to use every type of communication available to you, then you might want to rethink things.
You need to do your own thing.
If you’ve decided to move to different places, or you’ve always been in a LDR, then there must be a reason for this. You have to live your own life, and realise that you can’t be apart of everything happening in your partner’s life. It’s tough, but it helps to focus on why you’re staying in the place you’re in. It could be your dream job, or your friends and family are all close by – whatever the reason, focus on that when things get tough.
A bit like doing your own thing, it’s good to keep busy. Catch up with that friend you haven’t seen in years, start going to the gym or join a new club. Just find things to fill your time. Being distracted and making the most of your time without your bae with make the whole thing a lot smoother.
Make the most of your time together
When you do finally get to see your partner – make the most of it! We’re suckers for going to new restaurants or coffee shops that we’ve always wanted to try or even just exploring different parts of our city. It’s easy to want to stay locked away together all day and make up for lost time, but it’s good to get out there and try new things. Why not introduce them to your besties or show them your favourite place in your city – just get outside and try something different.
So that’s my thoughts really. It’s tough sometimes, especially on days like valentines when all you want is to snuggle up on the couch with bae & put on a romantic film. But there’s no reason you can’t do all those things when you see them. So keep powering on cause you got this!